Other than a few early squabbles, I managed to get all the way through school, including college, without any major altercations with any of my classmates. At home I learned to stick up for myself, with all of my brothers and sisters, and how to respond to teasing. With my brothers and sisters, I could, and did, get mad and show it. At school, I might get angry, but I rarely let anyone know. As I became less of a loner, starting I high school, I learned to enjoy the give and take of teasing among friends. When you're around people a while, you learn whom you can tease, and whom you should best leave alone. Some people are very literal-minded, and get offended at something said in jest. That included some of the people I worked with; I got in trouble more than once by saying things to some of my coworkers who thought I meant exactly what I said, no matter how ludicrous or exaggerated.

Our Lord faced criticism, much more than mere teasing, from the beginning of his ministry through his crucifixion. The Jewish leaders labeled him as a blasphemer, an illegitimate child, a friend of sinners and publicans, and a Sabbath-breaker, among other things. Worst of all, they called him a fake and a fraud, a man possessed by the Devil. He didn't just meekly accept everything he said; they weren't just slandering him, but the Father as well. On a number of occasions, such as in the message of the "woes," he clearly pointed out who and what they were. In the end, though, as he hung on the cross, he didn't condemn them at all. "Father, forgive them, " he said, "for they know not what they do."

There are different types of verbal attacks. Some, like malicious gossip or slander, are designed to tear down or destroy a person's reputation. Others aren't directed against us, so much, as against the Lord we serve and the faith we believe in. An article, the headline story, in fact, recently appeared in the local paper about a seminar being used to train police officers in West Virginia. The seminar teaches, among other things, that fundamentalist Christian churches might be considered as hate groups. This is particularly true if the pastor in a church teaches that homosexuality is morally wrong. This kind of message isn't directed at particular Christians, so much, as at what we believe in.

These kinds of attacks merit a response, though the form of the response should be guided by love. If we attack people who attack us, we are surrendering the battleground to Satan. Sometimes the best defense against slander is the kind of life we live, and the example we set. We can certainly try to set the record straight, but often denying the lies spread about us just gives them more credence. Christ did not attempt to rebut or refute the lies people told about him during his trial, or before Pilate. His life was his witness. Even Pilate, heathen that he was, recognized Christ had committed no crime worthy of death. As far as attacks on our faith are concerned, these are nothing new, and will probably get worse. The main thing these is that we are secure in who we are, and whose we are. Again, the life we live as Christians is our best defense against the attacks on our faith.

There is a lot of criticism we face everyday, of the common garden variety. This comes from people at work, acquaintances, family, friends, and, sometimes, from perfect strangers. I passed a fellow outside the building where I work the other day, and he made some snide comment about how long my tie was. People will criticize our choice of clothing, our hairstyle, the way we do our work, or the way we talk. They'll disagree with our opinions on everything from the weather to politics to the fastest route to China. At home, our spouses and / or children will frequently direct criticism at us that is much more personal, and more hurtful. The more we care about someone, the greater the hurt.

We can't always keep from getting angry at what people say. We can, though, learn to channel our anger in paths that aren't destructive. People sometimes say things thoughtlessly, unaware of how much their words sting. Sometimes they are striking out because of their own anger and hurt, which may have nothing at all to do with us other than that we are targets of convenience. At still other times, criticism springs from deep-seated insecurity. People with a poor self-image are often compelled to bring others down to their level, or to blame others for their problems because they can't bear to take responsibility themselves.

We can't hope to have a healthy response to criticism, whatever form it takes, unless we have a good opinion of ourselves. That doesn't mean selfish pride; it does mean being secure in our position in Christ, and in the knowledge that God loves us. The toughest hide we can develop doesn't come from years of enduring teasing and verbal abuse. It comes from the patience and self-control we develop during the course of our spiritual growth. It also comes from caring about others enough to see beyond the words they're saying, no matter how mean and spiteful, to the need behind them. If the people criticizing us are Christians, and they criticize routinely, they are probably carnal, or backsliders, and they need our prayers. We should never engage in insult exchanges, like so many over-aged children, or otherwise try to debate or outdo someone who is attacking us. The command to love our neighbor doesn't just extend to the point where he or she crosses our property line. We don’t turn the other cheek just when we're being kissed, but also when we're being slapped. All of us need tender hearts, but our hides must be tough.

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JESUS IS the Bridge Ministries

Beneath His Wings Devotionals - Vol. 2